Thursday, May 13, 2010

How do you handle a parent who competes their children against your children?

Well, without more details, I would say the best thing to do is ignore them. If they're saying things like ';My son scored more goals that your son and should have more playing time.'; or ';My daughter has been taking tap lessons longer than your daughter and should have the solo.'; Then just reply with something like ';Your son/daughter is a VERY good player/dancer. We're just happy that our child has the opportunity to play/dance with so many kids of different skill levels and we're proud of all of them.'; Then walk away.





If it's not so much competition as comparing them all the time: ';Billy doesn't catch a ball as well as Johnny does, have you noticed?'; ';Amy can spell her name AND count to 10, why doesn't Jenny do that yet?'; A similar answer would do: ';It really is great that Billy/Amy are so good at catching/spelling. Johnny/Jenny like to catch/spell, too and will probably catch up soon.'; Then smile politely and walk away.





The point is to not get dragged in to the competition. Nobody's kids are better than anyone else's and you should try to shield your kids from that mean-spirited competetiveness and focus on learning to take turns, learning how to be a good winner and a good loser, and enjoying the activity they're involved in.How do you handle a parent who competes their children against your children?
get your kids the better coaching.. kick the other kids parents kids butts.. do what you can to get the edge..How do you handle a parent who competes their children against your children?
Personally I just wouldn't let my children play with their children much anymore. Children don't need to be in an environment where they always feel extreme pressure to succeed or be better than someone else. I don't feel that it's healthy. Our society today pushes children so hard to be better than anyone else and I feel that it's detrimental to our children. In school's anyone who is in normal classes is stupid, those in Honors are normal, and those in AP are the ones considered intelligent. I don't even want to think about what the children in remedial programs are considered. It all leads to self esteem issues that can last a lifetime.
Don't handle them.


They're stuck-up snobs.


Although you can just laugh and say 'Hey, at least mine has love.' and see the look on their faces!
Well as they say, their always trying to keep up with the Jones's. just let them compete, as long as there's no bodily or emotional harm, let them act childish. You can't tell another grown person what to do with their kids.
I grew up in a split family home. My step father had two girls my age. We were always in competition with each other. And I can't lie and say our parents weren't a good part of it. If my mom went and bought me a sweater, he would go buy his girls one nicer and more expensive. We were competitive when it came to sports, school work, and even dating and driving.





This hurts the children. Especially their relationships with each other. We should had grown up being best friends! Getting ready for dances, proms, doing projects together, hanging out, movies, but we weren't. And now we are grown, married, and have children, and still yet the feelings are there. Now our parents compare the grandchildren. Its wrong.





Try doing more together. Most importantly talk with the other parent. It may be that that parent was cut down or didn't feel good about their self as a child. Try to resolve this issue as soon as you can.
get a better job because youll need the money to win the battle
Let them know that you feel they are acting immaturely.
Keep you kids away from her kids, people like that haven't figured out that the world doesn't revolve around them and their kids. You can try and talk to her but it probably won't work. Good Luck...
Have your children be better than them, my Angelica is way better than my brother Stu's Tommy and Dil.
I guess that I would try to talk to her by letting her know that you don't want to herts her feelings. then try telling her how you feel. Just let her know that it looks to you how ever it looks and then try talking to her about it and lit her know that it herts her kids.
Be the bigger person and brush it off... it happens all the time. You just got to learn that its not worth fretting over! Good Luck!

No comments:

Post a Comment